I would like to thank the Daily Boar’s big, hairy staff for giving me this opportunity to wish you all very gay Xmas. I’ll be at home, myself, pulling my crackers and stuffing the turkey. Well, you’ve got to give it a good old stuffing, haven’t you? Then I’ll be off up the Old Queen for a quickie. There’s nothing like a couple of stiff ones before eating out. I’ll be having breast for lunch. I never was much of a leg man, although I have a great fondess for meat and two veg. Then its up the back alley and home again for a game of Monopoly with my friends from the Commons. I always enjoy licking members. Naturally I’ll be attending their Christmas balls again this year and enjoying their testimonials. On Boxing Day I take in a boxing match. I really enjoy watching two half-naked men giving each other a thorough bashing round the ring. After which I usually wank off Christopher Biggins.
The Daily Boar 